Sifting through

It takes everything I have
To stop me from running through the streets
To stop the anxious evenings behind computer screens
Sifting through

Looking for where exactly I can define beauty
In the lines of her face
Straining to hold back laughter
In that spark in the corner of her mouth
When she’s feeling coy
In the distant gazes at the sky
Or at the side of my face
Or when she catches me staring
For too long

And neither of us can contain ourselves
The smoke rising from the burnt ashes
Twirling, spiraling
Around a lost girl
The same one who couldn’t understand
Why childhood sweethearts don’t last forever
Why love songs can’t be walking breathing
real.

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